Dear Fear of Growing Up,
I see you in every ticking clock, every passing season, every, “What are your plans after graduation?”
You take the shape of college applications, job interviews, and the looming reality that childhood is slipping through my fingers.
You creep into my thoughts late at night, making me question if I’m ready, if I’ll make the right choices, if I’ll ever feel as safe as I do now.
Every one of my friends seems to be stoked about graduating, but I can’t help fearing a future filled with expectations, responsibilities, and choices that seem too important for me to make. What if I’m not ready? What if I fail? What if growing up means losing the best parts of myself?
The world beyond high school feels overwhelming and uncertain, which ironically, is the same way I felt as an eighth grader stepping into high school. “The world beyond middle school seems too big,” I kept thinking to myself. I was terrified of crowded hallways, of friendships fading and never finding my place. But somehow, I did. I slowly adapted.
I found new friends who now feel like family, and I found my place in clubs, in classrooms, and in moments of laughter and late-night study sessions. High school wasn’t as terrifying as I once thought, and somehow, I became stronger and more confident than the scared middle schooler I once was.
But right now, I can’t help but feel the same way I felt back then. Maybe that’s the way change always feels — impossible at first until suddenly, it isn’t. Maybe in a few years, I’ll look back at this moment and wonder why I was ever afraid. I’ll have new experiences, new friends, and new hobbies.
Just like before, I will find my way.
Even though the thought of growing up makes my heart race and my thoughts spiral, I refuse to let anxiety hold me back since I know the future isn’t something to fear — it’s an opportunity to create.
